What is The Secret to Happiness? It’s Not What You Think.

Happiness. It is what we want for our loved ones and for ourselves.

Unfortunately, it is something that is relegated to the future. There is an endless list of reasons why we decide we can’t be happy, yet.

The path to a medical degree is a long one. We invest time, energy and money to pursue our professional career. We’re told that once we achieve our goal and land the perfect job, then we can begin to live our life.

When I finish school (training), then I'll be happy.

When I get married, then I’ll be happy.

When I have a baby...when I pay off my debt...when I get a better job...when the kids leave home...when I retire.

There are several problems with this way of thinking. First, by the time we are nearing our goal, we are already looking towards the next goal. The result is shifting to a future focus without allowing for true celebration and acknowledgement of our current achievement. Second, if you hang your happiness on people, situations and things, you will be disappointed as they change (change is guaranteed over time). Happiness is the result of a decision you make in the present moment. To choose to see things in a way that generates happiness. And, to remember that we are not meant to be happy 100% of the time.

Notice if there's a pattern showing up in your life of deferring happiness. You don't have to wait for external circumstances to change to be happy.

Happiness is an inside job. It's a choice you make each and every day.

When you set an intention to be happy you will. When your happiness is dependent on life always going your way or others changing their behavior (something you don't control), it feels elusive. And it's often futile, like a dog chasing it's own tail. It will always be just out of your reach.

So, stop chasing happiness and decide to be happy where you are in this moment. But how?

1. Master the art of appreciation: Practicing gratitude helps you focus your lens on the gifts already present in your life. Tuning in to what you appreciate, leads to seeing all the ways that your life is supporting you. It stimulates thoughts that will ultimately generate positive feelings and true happiness.
2. Attend to the well-being of your mind-body-spirit: Nurturing your whole self consistently and proactively can help to increase feelings of happiness. Pay attention to what you expose your mind to throughout the day - consider limiting the time spent in the 24/7 news cycle (doom-scrolling), negative input from social media and make time to disconnect from work and unplug. The benefits of regular mental rest is under appreciated. Prioritize your basic needs for nourishing meals, daily movement activity, and restorative sleep. Recharge your spirit through reading, meditation, listening to music that moves you, making music, spending time in nature, connecting with others, engaging in creative pursuits, etc.
3. Remind yourself of your decision to choose happiness: Using a mantra daily to help you set your intention for cultivating more joy and happiness in your life. Two of my favorites are "all is well" and "how can it get any better than this?" Listening to audio that remind you can also be helpful. Two of my favorite songs focused on happiness are Happy by Pharell Williams and Don't worry, Be happy by Bobby McFarrin.
   

What are your favorite go-to strategies to help you generate intrinsic happiness? Share in the comments below.