Busyness doesn't equal productivity: 4 tips to slow down to the speed of life

"Life has become too busy.  I need to slow down."  I heard myself silently repeat these words all too often throughout my week.  Each time I said them, I acknowledged that something needed to change, yet nothing did.  

As I sat down for the umpteenth time to create a plan to better manage my time, I had a revelation.  I am the common denominator throughout the periods of busyness.

I realized I didn't need another time management system to learn.  I needed to learn the art of self-management.

While I said my intention was to slow down and create more space in my life, I continued to take on new projects, volunteer for tasks and committees, etc.  

The question I really needed to answer:  "Why was I (sometimes unconsciously, sometimes not) keeping myself so busy?"

As I reflected on this question in my meditation, I started to notice how uncomfortable I was with "down time".  Even when there were no deadlines to meet, I found myself on my laptop checking email, researching ideas, and surfing the net.  It would be one thing if this activity led to greater productivity and results; unfortunately, that wasn't generally the case.

When I wasn't busy, there was a sense of dis-ease as difficult emotions emerged:  sadness, loneliness, and disappointment just to name a few.  Working had become a convenient excuse to avoid dealing with these feelings.

Once I recognized and accepted this truth, I had a choice:  continue to do things the way I always had and get the same results; OR do something different.  I decided to do the latter.


So, how do you both slow down AND manage the difficult emotions that arise?

1. Give yourself permission to feel what you feel.  Tara Brach teaches about the importance of recognizing what is happening in the moment.  Naming the feelings that are present take away alot of the fear that they may bring.  Emotions come and go like the weather changes...remember, it's temporary.
2. Make time and space in your schedule to "just be".  We have become a species of human doings rather than human beings.  Avoid the temptation to fill every minute of your schedule with something to do.  Create opportunities to simply practice being.  These valuable blocks of time often bring many insights and solutions to problems you've been looking for.
3. Honor yourself by setting healthy boundaries.  Set a cut-off time for work each evening and stick to it.  Say no (No.  It is a complete sentence) to additional work unless you first remove something from your plate.
4. Find support.  There is value in creating a circle of support (COS).  These are people who will encourage you and point out when you are stuck in a story that's holding you back.  Your circle may be made up of trusted friends, a mentor, coach, therapist or mastermind group.  Tell your COS what you're doing and elicit their support.  Partner with someone who also wants to make changes for greater accountability.  And don't be afraid to ask for help.

It's important for you to open your heart and mind in this process.  Be gentle with yourself.  When you prioritize taking care of you, your life shifts in positive and unexpected ways.  And you give others permission to do the same as you model being present for your life.  This is the key to balancing your life.

Your loved ones will thank you.

Your future self will thank you.

Leave a comment below and let me know what helps you to slow down.

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